Never would I have thought of a book review on Toke Makinwa’s ‘’ON BECOMING’’ . I mean she’s a multimedia personality, very vast in fashion and all things any ‘baby girl’ could wish for…what girl doesn’t love to be a baby girl for life? That said, let’s see how I fare because I tend to be a bit blunt.
What I really loved about the book is its bluntness, realness and blatant truthfulness. Though Robert Evans says ’’There are three sides to every story: my side, your side and the truth. And no one is lying. Memories shared serve each differently’’. Toke seemed to have written from all the three sides and this encouraged me to eat the book up within few hours of setting my eyes on it.
In my opinion, she left no stone unturned. She expressed her vulnerability, her fears which are very humane. My close Chum and Author, Yetunde Olasiyan in a book review said she got annoyed at the end. I guess she wrote that from trying to put herself in Toke’s painful shoes, got annoyed with her ex’s behaviour and arrived at that conclusion.
For me, I had a mix of emotions while reading but was satisfied at the end because she was able to summon courage, and make lemonades out of the lemons life served her. A particular sentence got to me: when her ex’s elder sister warned her not to marry her brother until she heard from God directly. But she went ahead without a clear go-ahead and she made me see how important that is concerning every aspect of our lives. She, from her ashes rose like a Phoenix! She was able to swallow all the darts thrown at her from the public and rise above all the negatives. Thanks to God (The God of multiple chances) and the beautiful souls that surround her.
In the last few weeks back, I found myself in some situations, so I switched to my ‘student mode’. Out of my bursting e-library, I ransacked and found out a book by Steve Harvey: ACT LIKE A LADY, THINK LIKE A MAN. I could literally see scenes from mine and others’ lives passing by in those pages. Even though I disagree with some of his points: points like a lady being viewed as cheap when she gives out her mobile number out so soon… Hello! Have you ever tried to be an entrepreneur in Nigeria? Personally, I believe you have a choice to ignore or block unwanted calls if they become pests. Second point I don’t agree with is not giving the booty until after ninety days at least. Call me an old soul, but my belief is that booty ain’t supposed to be given or shared until after the vows are made! The third point I’m still struggling with is that a man always wants something from a lady:
1. If you are willing to sleep with him
2. If you are, what would it take to do so…material things or marriage?
Now, is the heart of man that desperately wicked? I’m yet to come to a conclusion. I’m subject to other views, please.
From Steve’s book, some points were etched on my heart and I doubt they’ll be erased at all. He made it known that if a man was yet to achieve the three points: Who he is; What he does and How much he makes. Once he is yet to have one of them unanswered, he cannot focus on a lady like she deserves. Don’t get me wrong, he might not have all going on so well, but he must have the first two and be on the path to the last of the three points aforementioned. Because without these, he feels less of a man and when you try to cocoon and make him comfy, in your bid to let him know you got his back his natural instincts to be a MAN , a provider and a protector are inhibited so he continues to hunt for a female with whom he can be who is supposed to be!!!
While reading Steve’s book, my mind kept shifting back to Toke’s book. Adding his points up, I figured why her ex did what he did. I don’t think I can recover from Steve’s book…not soon anyways. But with the way my reading appetite has been aroused; I hope to stumble across other books that will make greater impact on me…that’s part of my goals this year. I encourage you to develop the habit of reading, even if it’s one book per year. Like they say, no knowledge is lost.
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